Three "Wise Men"??? I seriously doubt it...

Note: I am not a Christmas hater, or a man hater... fyi... :)

So on my way to work, I usually enjoy listening to my favorite radio show… but this morning, there was only… Christmas songs… ugh.

Now, I’m not a scrooge, but I think it’s a little early for Christmas songs. It is December FIRST... not TWENTY FIRST... And in my opinion, if they ARE going to be playing them, they should play some freakin’ songs that people actually KNOW. I didn’t hear any jingle bells, Rudolph, Santa Baby, nothing...

But all the Christmas songs and chatter (about Mary, Joseph, Jesus, the 3 wise men, and all their fun loving animal friends) got me thinking – about the phrase “Three Wise Men”.

What a load of crap. I can’t think of anytime that I have seen 3 men get together and actually be “Wise”.

In fact, if you even get two together, I honestly believe that their IQs actually DROP about 50 points. And holy crap, if you add alcohol into the mix, they just keep getting dumber and dumber with every shot...

The man that is a genuine intellectual will suddenly have a full and complete list of dick and fart jokes to share with you AND all his friends...

The husband that is usually very responsible will be using his ‘one phone call’ to let you know that he will not be home for dinner that night...

And the hard-working, down-to-earth guy will have to explain why he and his friends decided to skip work in order to build a 40 foot water slide off the top of your house into the neighbor’s pool while you visited your sister over the weekend...

Now, add in some cool shit like gold, frankincense and myrrh. First, frankincense and myrrh are “technically” considered to be incense. Which means they can be lit on fire and smoked – medically the smoke is used for easing depression and anxiety.

(And by the way, what the hell would a little baby need that for? How depressed and anxious can he really be at 3 days old?? And the gold? Is that for mommy and daddy so they can get a real hotel room instead of hanging out with the cattle?)

Whatever. If 3 guys really had all that, they sure as shit wouldn’t be taking it to a baby shower. They would take that gold, hit the nearest pub, grab some dancing girls, and party in the new year.