Monday, April 20, 2009

On a Mission...

So, to answer a question - Needsleepy, yes I am on a mission to find the perfect body hair removal product/service available for lazy ass people... like ME...

Now, I stated before that I made an appointment with a professional to have them make me sleek, shiny and hairless, and my appointment was supposed to be last week. Well, I talked to another friend who suggested "Body Sugaring" in lieu of waxing. Apparently it is less painful, only removes the hair and any dead skin (as opposed to the whole top layer of skin with waxing), and since it only removes the dead skin, you are able to go over and over the same spot as much as needed to get each and every subborn little hair.

After hearing about this amazing service, I immediately called and cancelled my original appointment and made another one at a different salon to have myself "Sugared". My appointment is on Thursday this week, and I am REALLY looking forward to it!!!!

WARNING: The following paragraphs have to do with girly parts... just letting you know, so you are not shocked or offended... :)

I do have to admit, I did make an ass out of myself when I called though. I asked them about pricing and they told me that legs were X amount, bikini was X amount, and LA bikini was X amount. I asked "well whats the difference between regular bikini and LA"? The woman paused for a second and explained to me in a very kind way that Regular was just the part that would show around the edge of your undergarments and LA would be a complete removal of all hair...

Well, duh, Angie, pull your head out of your ass... what did you think it was?? How many different ways IS THERE to wax a bikini area? Anyways, that brings me to my main concern...

Could I really be capable of letting some strange woman give me a LA bikini "sugaring"?????

Just picturing the scene in my head makes me cringe... I mean, do I really want to sit in a chair with my ankles in the air, letting some lady spread some concoction all over my girly parts, then rip it off "over and over again until she gets every last stubborn little hair"???? I don't know if I am woman enough for that, to be honest.

I went ahead and made the appointment for it, but I might chicken out.

Even though woman don't have the same issues with their "downstairs" as men do (Like, I'm not toooo worried about if another woman's 'giner is bigger than mine....), I PERSONALLY do feel some apprehension about my upcoming appointment... I mean, what if I have a weird looking vagina? I mean, to be honest, I haven't seen THAT MANY vaginas, so I wouldn't really know... I think it is normal, but what if I have an extra lip, or something is in the wrong place???? Or what if ALLL those vaginal child deliveries made it saggy and droopy??

I mean, seriously, I know there are parts of mine that I CAN'T EVEN SEE!! What if I have some weird birthmark in the shape of a dildo or something equally odd and/or embarrassing?

Not to mention the fact that your hair is supposed to be 1/4" long... well I got a ruler out today just to kinda see how long 1/4" really is, and holy crap! My legs, I'm not really sure I'm gonna hit the mark, and sadly, I think I have left the 1/4" goal in the freakin' dust on the Downstairs area. Will she have to get scissors out to trim it up, just to be able to FIND the freakin' thing??? And do I really want a stranger that close to my bits with really sharp scissors????

I usually have that tiny bit of embarrassment when I have a pedicure, especially if I haven't shaved my legs recently (and as we have discussed, that is AN EXCELLENT possibility). Well, this is a little more personal that your feet, you know... I mean, is this chick gonna go run and tell the whole salon that I'm lopsided, or how I was so furry I could have passed for a snow shoe????? Then what happens next time when I go in, will they all laugh me??????

Hmmm.... am I overthinking this?

Anyways, I might chicken out and have her do my underarms instead... we'll see...


  1. Sometimes it is called a brazilian as well. That is what I always get. The front isn't as bad as you might think. And usually not so embarrassing. You just lay on your back and spread em. The bad part is when they ask you to turn around and get the back......hahahahaha. Good luck! Where are you going by the way?

  2. Thank you for overthinking AND talking me out of it s well!!!!!!!!!
    I was laughing so hard, mu husband really, really, really wanted to know WHYYYYYY????!!!!!!!

  3. Oh well shit Amber, thanks for bringing up "THA BACK AREA".... /cry... I don't even want to go into all the things that could be wrong back there!!! I've never really seen it!!

    And let your husband read it, Christine! Maybe he will develop a new-found respect for women in general and all the crap we do to stay beautiful for men... :)

  4. I am always afraid if I get a pedicure I'll kick the poor girl in the nose.. I'm VERY ticklish.

  5. I have a little something for you to pick up on my blog :O)

  6. I'm anxious to hear if you went through with your plans...and how long will it be before the hair grows back?

  7. go for it...i love mine,and it makes me feel naughty, all free down there, I like to go commando it feels great and sometimes i do it at work and wear a skirt and give some of the guys that i fancy a little show ,if you know what i mean...and the sex feels better... it's worth it

  8. LOL Did you ever find out if you had a weird looking giner?! How did everything work out?!


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